Hate to be the one to break it to you, Rory, but you do realise that "Heaven" is (to quote the old advertising literature) "Europe's biggest and most famous gay nightclub".

You might want to amend that little card!

rowrie - don't you know ANYthing about the wo-men. they want to be wined and dined, and feel a 'connection'. As a computer nerd i feel i am in a good poistition to tell you about women and their mysterious ways. of mystery. As i am wholey untained by knowedge on these matters. thats right you won't find any ladies pulling my strings and telling what to write!

so here is what i do, when I issue a 'run' of limited edition bootie call cards. I hire some guys to help me, and we set up a chain gang. One person goes around to pick her up with flowers for The Date. he takes her to the high class resteraunt (i recommend mcd's in stains - they have the cleanest bogs). Then the next guy comes in, hes in charge of ordering and wine. next guy does mains, and last guy does desert and drops her off at my place.

then you'll get as many ladies as your tounge can handle.

that tips free. of content.

--
Lord Flasheart: Always treat your plane like you treat your woman.

Lieutenant George: What do you mean, sir, take her home at the weekend to meet your mother?

Lord Flasheart: No, I mean get inside her five times a day and take her to heaven and back!

Ian -

I didn't know that.

The biggest, and fanciest one, I went to was probably the George in Dublin where I watched two transvestites dressed as pregnant women beat each other up in a boxing ring with huge sacks of cocaine (flour).

It was awesome.

While I was going to school in London, though, I lived in Kensington and so was just a quick walk from Earl's Court where I encountered many an interesting club (my roomate was gay - and I mean, like, *GAY* - he was supergay, actually, and he'd always invite me out clubbing and dancing).

You know, everytime I write something like this, the whole "Rory is Gay" thing probably gains a little more traction.

Whatever.

Anyway, fact is, the gay clubs were typically more fun than the straight clubs.

Wow. Diggin' a hole, diggin' a hole...

Also, I thought of you a couple weeks ago - I watched the Christmas special of Dr. Who, and had *very* mixed feelings. Eccleston, against all odds, replaced Baker as my favourite (<- ha ha - limey spelling) doctor, and I want him BACK, BACK, BACK!

But things might work out with New Guy.

I hope.

And, losing Rose halfway through the series - I just don't know what I'm going to do.

But, yeah - I thought of you and was going to write, but as usual, I've been swamped with travel and this "work" stuff.

I'm really good at thinking about people - I'm *really* bad at letting them know.

Hope you're well, yo.

Screw the connection, the wining and dining, send me some of those cards!!

;P

When I was living in Dublin a few years ago The George was the one I always pointed American tourists to if they asked diections to a traditional Irish pub...(OK, so my sense of humour is juvenile...that's how I stave off old age. That and eating any children I may have, of course).

I must have missed a heart-wrenching episode or two though in the fashionably neurotic soap opera of Rory's life, because last time I was paying attention all of your non-monk-related needs would surely have been met by The Impossibly Lovely Aydika? Moving right along, next subject...

Kevin -

"When I was living in Dublin a few years ago The George was the one I always pointed American tourists to if they asked diections to a traditional Irish pub"

*Word*. That's awesome.

"I must have missed a heart-wrenching episode or two though in the fashionably neurotic soap opera of Rory's life, because last time I was paying attention all of your non-monk-related needs would surely have been met by The Impossibly Lovely Aydika?"

We actually broke up on December 8th (or roundabouts).

It was after the fifth time we got engaged.

Something about having gotten engaged five times suggested that we might not have been the best match for each other.

The relationship-honeymoon months were great - it was the dissipation of fantasy and introduction of reality into the relationship that didn't go so well.

After that, I was a bit relationship shell-shocked and decided not to go near another woman (at least in a relationshippy way) for six months.

And I am now nearing the end of that time.

Long story short, I've been masturbating for four months.

Rory -

"Long story short, I've been masturbating for four months"

NOW I understand why you don't shake hands with people. They're tired.

Re: Doctor Who

Rose is staying for the whole of Series 2. Gossip has it she'd had a fling with Ecclestone and when he left thought it wouldn't be fun without him and that Who was going to open doors in Hollywood for her. Hence the "leaving half way series 2" announcement. Turns out the single Hollywood interest disappeared and she's realised she's onto a good thing with Who so she's now signed up for whole of Series 2 and possibly Series 3 too.

Tennant isn't Ecclestone but he's growing on me. I think he'll work out.

I missed the Christmas episode. The first "official" episode in the new series (the one after that) was really, really dire, although the many, continued close-ups of Billie's heaving bosom saved the episode for many. Fortunately the second episode (which aired here on Saturday) was much better. This Saturday we get the return of Sarah Jane Smith and a rather battered looking K9.

I'm well. Hope you are too.

Do they sell virtual scissors on eBay? 'Cause I'm thinking that's the tool I need to cut out that coupon...

ticket - shmicket

I'm sorry Rory, I'm going to have to pass on the 3 minute ride to heaven, as I need a lot more time than that. Three minutes wouldn't be worth getting undressed for.

Like I said before, shut up and go get *me* a martini! NOW!

Ian, thanks for reminding me about Saturday's episode. I was disappointed by episode 1 of the second season (except I too thought Rose looked smashing!) but thought episode 2 looked promising.

Ok. so. I don't know what kind of meds you're on right now but...ummm...errr...could I have some?

The stuff I'm on doesn't even come close to giving me that level of self-worth.

Sweet.

Rorwie -

"Long story short, I've been masturbating for four months"

Rorwie's readship breakdown -

http://neopoleon.com/blog/posts/17974.aspx


Is any one else here concerned out this?

You STOP masturbating when you have a girlfriend? Is there some trick to this because I've only had "breaks" from my masturbatory habits, never quite a full blown vacation.

The real question is now how do I word what I just said not to sound like none of my girlfriends have ever met all of my needs sexually? Or how do I word it to not sound like I have one hand down my pants at all times? Either way, apparently, I'm screwed (no pun intended).

Jeremy, you're an animal. Leave it at that. Plus, no chick needs to know you've got arthritis in one hand.

Rory, 3 minutes with you is better than a free sandwich.

Hey---

I have to admit, I saw you at an MSDN event in Bellevue over a year ago and have been thinking about you ever since. Do you remember me? I was the only caucasian female under 30?

Signed,
A Cute Senior C# Engineer (yeah, I'm female)

RoryFan -

"I have to admit, I saw you at an MSDN event in Bellevue over a year ago and have been thinking about you ever since. Do you remember me? I was the only caucasian female under 30?"

Here's an interesting phenomenon - when there *is* a female under 30 in the room, I try not to pay any attention to her because I don't want her to feel that she's on the spot for being the only female in the room under 30.

So, no - I don't remember you. I was probably too busy avoiding eye-contact with you so that I could make you feel like there was nothing strange about being the only female under 30 in the room at an MSDN Event.

Not quite sure what to write after that last bit.

- Rory

I, Rory Blyth, am AMERICA COMPANY

Pillows - WHY

OK - I'll stop ignoring LinkedIn