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Secret Truths About the Universe - #4

If you're hiking on a mountain and it gets cold, then you can wear a blanket to make yourself warmer.

If you care about your loved ones, then tell them about this message.

If you don't care about your loved ones, then tell them to go hiking but not to brink a blanket. If the person asks why he can't bring a blanket, then you have to say, "Because they attract bears."

If he says, "Why?" then you have to say, "Bears like blankets."

And if he's all, "Who told you that?" then you should respond with, "A bear expert."

If, after this convincing argument, he still wants to go hiking on a cold mountain without a blanket, then wait until his back is to you and then shoot him.

He was going to die anyway.

Published Tuesday, January 02, 2007 6:45 PM by Rory

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Comments

 

a nonny mouse said:

c'mon dude, quit with the secrets and get to why 2006 sucked. I want to know how I figured in the equation
January 2, 2007 7:10 PM
 

Rory said:

That starts tomorrow...
January 2, 2007 7:27 PM
 

AdamKinney said:

This is my favorite secret revealed so far.
January 2, 2007 9:24 PM
 

E said:

Reminds me of the following...

If you love something, let it go
If it doesn't come back, hunt it down and kill it...
January 3, 2007 9:16 AM
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About Rory

I *own* this site, you loser.