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Are You Passionate About Utilizing Your Core Competencies To Effect Strategic Outcomes?

I certainly am. There's nothing I like better than being passionate about utilizing my core competencies to effect strategic outcomes. Except, perhaps, for utilizing my core competencies to effect strategic outcomes and win-win solutions.

I'm also passionate about recognizing diversity in the workplace. I'm passionate about embracing diversity in the workplace. Hell, I'll make out with diversity if that's what makes you happy.

My life is amazingly good. I'm thankful to be alive, and that makes this period rare in the history of Rory. I'm also thankful to be in mostly good health, as being in mostly good health is not how I've been spending my year. Believe it or not, I still haven't fully recovered from my problems in June. Fortunately, nothing's wrong enough to detract from the quality of my life, and the relative difference between now and life in June is enough to have me thinking I'm a perfect specimen of humankind.

However, since it's apparently vital to the continued functioning of the universe that something in my life be all bust up and crapsticks, I'm looking for a job.

The plan was to keep on keeping on the way I've been keeping on since quitting my job in October, but when I rebuilt my life around savings rather than income, I didn't foresee the arrival of the bidniss that would bring to my life something all bust up and crapsticks. It was unexpected. That means I didn't see it coming. Put another way, if I were psychic, I'd have known it would happen, but I'm not, so I didn't. I know there are tons of people in this world who call themselves psychics, but, despite their ability to connect with the spirits of dogs in doggy heaven to see how things are going, they're terrible at predicting stuff. If it weren't for all the concrete proof that they can and do listen to the whispers of kitty phantoms, I might even say they aren't psychic at all. Not that the discrediting of psychics is a priority for me. Even if it were, I'd keep my findings private, as I don't want to be the one to have to tell all the weirdoes that nobody really knows if Mr. Fluffles is having an A-Ok time up in the heaven. Let these people have their comfort.

The nature of this unexpectedness is familial. "Familial" is a fancypants word that means "people you can't date." It refers specifically to your family. That's people who are related to you, many of whom have genetic abnormalities similar to your own. If you have a giant horn instead of a nose, and if you live with someone who also has a giant horn instead of a nose, that person is very likely a member of your family. Don't date this person. It's the fact that someone up your ancestral line was "indiscriminate" with another family member that got you a face-horn in the first place. In fact, don't date anybody. Don't reproduce. Keep indoors and watch TV until you pass from this world to the next. We don't want abominations like you walking among us. We don't even want you hidden among us. Just go away. I'm sorry I brought this up.

Because the issue isn't mine own, I shalln't produce its mysterious ways in word form upon this screen. What I will share is that it involves someone I'm very close to, and that something is going wrong in this someone's life that will, sometime in the next few months, make this person's life much more difficult, and it's something from which this person is unlikely to recover.

It doesn't involve jail time or pregnancy or any of the other things that would normally ruin your life (though I hear prison isn't actually all that bad). The one bright side is that this problem can be dealt with in part through money. A lot of money. Probably more money than I could produce, but not more money than other members of the family, in cooperation with The Smartest Man in the World, could produce together.

According to my original plan for post-Microsoft life, I was going to hang out, recover, write, socialize, and decompress from years of madness and stress. Despite a couple periods of suicidal depression and too much time spent in hospitals from an allergic reaction to meds, I think I'm getting there. Like I said, my life is amazingly good.

A side-effect of this leisure is boredom. Most of my friends work, so I'm left alone during many hours of each day. I've been passing the time by working out an easy, single, unified math to replace all known forms of the mathematics. I used it last week to prove that light is neither particles nor waves. It took fifteen seconds and two symbols, and looked quite elegant on paper thanks to my math's wingding-based notation.

You can understand why I'm so bored.

So, because of a looming financial issue and growing boredom, I started looking for "normal" work around the beginning of July. Something where I get up in the morning, make my way to a place where people I don't want to see are waiting for me, sit down at a desk, and wonder what in the hell I'm doing with my life.

Of everything I've done, I miss public speaking the most. You'd think it'd be easy to find such work since most people fear public speaking more than death, but there's not much out there. I found a position for United Way that sounded good. United Way guilts people out of their money and then distributes that money among various charities, local and national. The fact that it paid so little that its employees are probably more in need of donations than the charities they're collecting for was offset by the coolness of using talking skills to improve somebody's life at the expense of someone else's.

It was shortly after finding that job that I learned of the familial predicament. Fun is no longer the primary criterion. Gobs of cash. That's the new one. I need gobs and gobs of cash. I'm putting my soul on eBay. I've never understood what people mean by the term "selling out," but I like the sound of it. I'm ready to compromise everything I believe in for ingots of gold and silver and anything else valuable that can be shaped into an ingot.

You might wonder why I would put any of this on myself when it's someone else's problem. I don't have an answer. I think you either get it or you don't, but one way to try to understand is to ask yourself if you love anybody. If you do, what would you be willing to do to help them? When it comes to people I care about, I'm generally willing to go much further to help them than I ever would for myself. Don't know why. I feel like it's hardwired. To stand by and do nothing is much harder than to work like mad to help, and that's just the way it is.

These new priorities widened my search significantly. I told myself back in October that I'd stay away from tech, but I've been taking a look along with everything else. The two things I'm working on hardest are writing and music. Everybody tells me that both lead to destitution, but I've noticed that the writers and musicians who actually have talent also have a better shot at making gobs and gobs of cash. Plus, I have excellent connections on the music side of things. Not so much for writing, but I'm trying to figure out how to change that.

Still, I figure it's smart to have something to fall back on. Something, you know, like a job.

I've looked through a ton of tech listings, and although I'm qualified for everything, I don't think I have the patience to go back into a corporate environment. Seeing all the corp-speak turned me off. When I'm dating someone, I need to be able to respect her. This is not, oddly, a requirement for some people. Similarly, I need to be able to respect the people I'm working for. If I take a position with a company I don't respect, it gets hard to respect myself, and I like respecting myself.

I don't see how I can respect a company that employs people who communicate in corp-speak.

The lack of imagination kills me. The qualifications necessary are insane (you must have every skill, five degrees, ten years of experience, an IQ of at least 70, be able to type 300 WPM, and run the entire business with your smallest, least useful appendage). The language used in the postings is horrific.

Check out this BS:

Do you have a passion for collaboration and customer service? Do you love public speaking and delivering group presentations? Do your strengths include initiative and innovation? If you answered yes, then you'll want to explore this exciting entry level opportunity.

What is it with the word "passion" nowadays? My dictionary defines "passion" as "strong and barely controlled emotion." Is that really a quality you want in your employees? Particularly when it comes to "collaboration and customer service"? When I think of passion and collaboration, the word "orgy" comes to mind.

Continuing with the alliterative theme, what's the deal with "initiative and innovation"? What happened to passion for collaboration? Initiative, by most definitions, is something you do on your own. It means that you can, on your own, get things started. Or that you can, necessarily without the help of others, take charge of something. That's not collaboration - that's domination.

Then there's my favorite word: innovation. It has been so abused by corp-speak that it doesn't mean anything. Looking at recent years in tech, innovation seems to involve buying someone else's product, branding it, and then selling it in your own box. I've also heard the word used in reference to the creation of a feature nobody wants, needs, or can figure out how to use, but that hasn't been seen before. Again, do you really want that?

Come join a team that is cross-trained, goal oriented and eager to see everyone succeed. We recognize both individual and team contributions to success. We're seeking creative candidates who are out-of-the-box thinkers with a passion for problem solving, utilizing win-win solutions.

The first sentence is meaningless, brain-dead drivel, but also a sentence you'll see again and again relatively unchanged. Isn't it a given that the team is "goal oriented and eager to see everyone succeed"? Is this to imply that other teams strive for failure through aimlessness?

It's good to see they "recognize both individual and team contributions to success." I feel good about it. I really do. Really, really good.

What does it mean?

The word in that sentence with the most impact is "and." That's creepy.

The phrase "out-of-the-box" is dead. It never made sense. It's incompatible with corporate thinking. It's hard to have passionate collaborators when they're all moving in different directions. In the old days, if you were an "out-of-the-box" thinker, you knew it because your ideas were greeted by, "She's a witch!"

People don't like "out-of-the-box" thinking. Even when they believe they do, they don't truly accept it. When someone asks you for out-of-the-box ideas, you're really being asked to leave your box for a different one. It might be a bigger box, but it's still a freaking box. The reason HR pushes so hard for "appreciating diversity" is that most people hate diversity and need to be told what to do with it.

There are so many people who claim to be out-of-the-box thinkers that out-of-the-box is the new box.

Continuing, the word "passion" returns, but is overshadowed by what might be the most horrific word of them all:

Utilize

It doesn't mean "use". It's heading that way, but only through constant abuse by... well, by pretty much everybody.

It's an ugly word. There's a reason you won't find it in any good poetry. Or, for that matter, any good writing.

It's a faux-scientific, faux-technical sounding thing.

To "utilize" something means that you're using that thing effectively, typically for a purpose other than what was originally intended. You would use a flashlight to see in the dark, but you would utilize it to knock somebody out. If you say that you're utilizing a flashlight to see in the dark, it tells me that you don't know what flashlights are for. Or, more likely, that you don't know what the word "utilize" is for.

There are cases where "utilize" is appropriate, but they're few. For example, you would utilize your degree in psychology, business administration, art, or English, as there are no known direct applications for them. If you're unsure which is correct, and you probably are, go with "use".

If you're "passionate" about "communicating effectively," then the first thing you need to learn is how to deliver your message as simply as possible. Go read some Mark Twain or Kurt Vonnegut. Some of the most well known authors in the world, and their styles are so similar that you might think one copied the other. My money's on Vonnegut copying Twain, but that's only because Twain died before Vonnegut was born. Other evidence isn't as conclusive.

Maybe it's academia that does it, but there's a bountiful and plethoric superfluity of sesquipedalianists out there who have recourse to their thesauri in an oscillatory methodology and you already don't know what I'm saying.

In human language, I'm saying that there are tons of people who write with big words, possibly because they think they sound smarter. As with anything, the more complex something is, the more skill you'll need if you hope to avoid biffing it up, and most people are bad writers. You aren't qualified to pilot a 747 just because you can make a paper airplane.

We are a dynamic and flexibly adaptive organization with a focus on continuous process improvement. We embrace and reward resourcefulness, innovation and dynamic thinking.

Stop! Just stop! I've been driven to use exclamation-points. Do you know where the exclamation-point is located on a keyboard?

NEXT TO THE BRINK OF MADNESS. THAT'S WHERE.

Allow me to translate that text into normal human language:

We are constantly finding new ways to suck. We suck so badly that we've gotten really good at climbing out of the pits we dig for ourselves. It's lonely in those pits, and we're looking for someone fun who can do shadow-puppets down there to keep us entertained while we figure out how to climb back out. You must be able to do shadow-puppets of animals, celebrities, and funny violence.

If your shadow-puppets are good, we will hug you and pay you for it. Bonus points if you can figure out how to make shadow-puppets without a source of light. We're convinced it can be done, but we need an out-of-the-box thinker to make this dream a reality. Something on wikipedia called "physics" says we can't have shadows without light. We don't know what box they're living in!!!

We can't wait for you to join our team. When we finally get ourselves out of the last of our pits, we look forward to figuring out what our actual jobs are.

Also, if you're too smart, and if we figure it out, we'll fire you so that our own positions aren't threatened by your ability to do work.

Incredibly, the posting goes on. And on.

And on.

With the exception of one more snippet, I'll spare you the remainder. I just can't stop without this bit. It's up there with the "utilize" problem:

Working collaboratively with Recruiting and Employee Relations teams to ensure smooth processes for candidates

I could write as much about this one sentence as I did about the previous few paragraphs.

I won't. I'm just saying I could.

These morons have such a boner for the hot words of corp-speak that they can't stop. They're out of control. One might even say they're passionate.

"Working collaboratively with Recruiting and Employee Relations teams..."

Can anybody tell me how you could work "with" other teams without collaboration?

It makes as much sense to say:

"Working with with other teams..."

But this observation draws attention away from "Recruiting and Employee Relations teams..."

Exactly how much infrastructure is necessary to hire someone and put him to work? It sounds like I'd need a lawyer, a lobbyist, and a favor to get anything done.

Sigh.

When I got my first contract, I was intimidated. I was very young, surrounded by people who'd been playing adult for decades. I assumed they all knew exactly what they were doing. I eventually found out that, working part-time and alone, I replaced an entire team of other contractors. I got the job done for about 10% of what they were being paid. Before learning this, I thought I was doing terribly - that I was constantly in danger of getting dropped. Instead, my contract got renewed a couple times, and what was supposed to be an eight day job turned into nearly three years. I call it my Gilligan's Island contract. In addition to getting dough and experience, I learned a lot about business from someone who became a sort of mentor. I don't know why he helped me, but he completely changed my life by being one of the few people I've met in business who wasn't totally full of it.

One thing I learned was that nobody knows what they're doing. They just try to get better at hiding it.

Big words, clumsy florid prose, uncritical attachment to stupid ideas that sound good... that's what the corporate world, for the most part, really is.

Rather than blowing money on bullshit positions for teams like "Employee Relations", this is the type of job posting they ought to be putting together (with some honesty thrown in for fun):

Looking for a skeptical critical-thinker who can spot BS, root it out, and destroy it.

Your efforts will probably lead to the firing of half the company. If you're OK with this, drop us a line. You can send us your resume, but the truth is, we don't know what to look for in those things. Generally, we throw away any written with Comic Sans Serif font. The remaining pile is looked over by someone trained to squint and go "Hm..." at intervals that make us think there's a pattern to his thought process. One of your first tasks will be to figure out if we should fire that guy.

We could make up some numbers about goals and whatnot, but it'd only make things harder on us later. There was this one time when we renamed all the columns of our office Fantasy Football League spreadsheet and used it to support a plan for an innovative, collaborative something-or-other, but we got asked some questions about the numbers that almost exposed our fraud. We saved our fannies by assassinating the nosy VP behind that inquisition. Since we already have a ratio of five VPs to each regular employee, nobody noticed his absence, but the body started to stink after a couple weeks. We pinned it on someone's old yogurt in the employee fridge and got the stench under control with 300 strategically placed boxes of baking soda, but we'd rather not go through that again.

So how about it? Come save us from ourselves. We'll give you some money while we take credit for your success. Win-win!

Unfortunately, for reasons that are too numerous to address in this post, skepticism and critical-thinking are not among the skills that are "embraced" and "rewarded" around here. Nor are they "recognized". Most people don't even know what they are.

Back to writing songs and stories and other silliness...

Published Monday, August 04, 2008 5:36 PM by Rory

Filed Under:

Comments

 

Lloyd said:

Ok, first things first. Your posts are brilliant and hilarious and massive. I actually have to make notes throughout your posts to know what to post as a comment. I mean, I don't mind, it makes for an altogether more interesting read vs the tiny posts. But I just lost the notepad document, and I really, really can't be bothered re-doing it since it's 0214 right now and I'm going mountaineering (stupid word, like utilize, it's more of a big rock :\) tomorrow (read: today), so I kinda need to get my sleep.

So, all in all, today all I have to say is:

Sorry, but I'll probably post again tomorrow (today) with something more substantial if I didn't rip my hands to shreds rock-eering so badly I can't type. Probably what gloves are for.

I remember you mentioning something about a book ages ago. And now you reminded me with your writing and stuff - are you going to write one? I mean.. I would buy it. Over and over. And over. I love your writing style. You said about Huck Finn etc sounding the same - well you sound like nobody else, ever, and I am /in love/ with your writing style.

This makes me weird :(

But I'm tired, and I've been eating weird stuff all day (coke - the drink; 'course, a whole onion deep-fat-fried and a cheese and onion pasty...this is what happens when a person who cannot cook is left to fend for himself), and I've gotta go to the doctors soon... and I hate doctors.
More than I hate people in general. Non geeks annoy me. I'm going off on a tangent now, and I'm not going to because I would love to get to bed before finishing this. Maybe I'll blog about it. Just not now.

Toodles :)

Lloyd

PS:(get IM)

PPS:(gtalk)

PPPS:(live meeeesssengerrrr)

PPPPS:(got the message yet? :D)
August 4, 2008 6:23 PM
 

Lloyd said:

I just re-read that, and the last bit makes no sense. Well, it does if you sortof squint a little and miss out the occasional word. I need sleep :( Night!
August 4, 2008 6:26 PM
 

Andrew said:

I'm very sorry your loved one is going through a difficult time, and I wish that person and you all the best in getting through it with a minimum of pain and expense. Please let us know if we can help.

Except Lloyd, here, who apparently is a bit hopped up on Wonka Bars. :-)
August 4, 2008 7:42 PM
 

punky said:

You might enjoy this essay about the sad state of written English per 1946: http://www.resort.com/~prime8/Orwell/patee.html

My favorite quote is this: "[English] becomes ugly and inaccurate because our thoughts are foolish, but the slovenliness of our language makes it easier for us to have foolish thoughts."

You will find your arch-nemesis "utilize" listed under the section about "pretentious diction"; words that "are used to dress up a simple statement and give an aire of scientific impartiality to biased judgements".

There's also a wonderfully ironic passage, proving that Orwell isn't without fault himself: "the passive voice is wherever possible used in preference to the active"(!)

Finally, if you are like me, you might get a kick out of some of the British terms and phrases themselves, e.g., "by dint of" and "jackboot".
August 5, 2008 2:29 AM
 

grimy said:

brilliant! (of course - unnecessary exclamation mark, oh there it is, I had to look)
August 5, 2008 5:02 AM
 

Dave said:

Look, will you just write a book so I can press some money into the sweaty hands of a greedy proxy? If necessary, just bundle up all your existing essays and we'll buy those instead.

It worked for Joel. Twice!

Alternatively put "My dictionary defines 'passion' as 'strong and barely controlled emotion.' Is that really a quality you want in your employees?" on a poster and I'll buy that (still chortling).
August 5, 2008 5:50 AM
 

Ian said:

Lloyd -

"Sorry, but I'll probably post again tomorrow (today) with something more substantial if I didn't rip my hands to shreds rock-eering so badly I can't type. Probably what gloves are for."

You should utilize Saran wrap. enough of it around your hands would act like gloves..
August 5, 2008 9:09 AM
 

LilBrownBear said:

At my current company, we use a lot of Chinglish...probably because it's essentially a Chinese-owned company.  Being a token gringo, I'm assaulted on a daily basis with farcical vocabulary.  E.g., "You need to co-work together with Chow Ling."

My favs are "resource" (which I'm sure everyone hears misused WAY too much to describe us lumps of coal...er, people), "align", and "visibility".

I'm especially titillated when I hear them used together.  E.g., "We must align our resources to ensure proper project visibility of our MBO."

It makes me think of....well, orgies.  Usually of the "hey! you serf!  bend over, and ALIGN THIS!" variety.  Of course, I hear these words used more often as reorg time approaches...

I used to be able to diagram sentences really well.  I was really proud of this in 8th grade, figuring that it separated me from the rest of the grammar-challenged.  But messes like the above simply drive me mad!  To prevent my English parser from breaking, I've had to crank up my BS filter when I come to work...because all the ESL classes on earth ainta gonna improve my coworkers vocab and grammar much.
August 5, 2008 9:10 AM
 

Rory said:

Lloyd -

Hilarious :)

That's all I have to say about that.

Don't worry about not making sense. You mostly did make sense, and where you didn't, it was entertaining.

And, believe it or not, the continued pressure to get with the IM is working. I've thought about it several times today, which is several times more often than I usually think about it.

I also just read your most recent email, and I'm totally gonna write you back.

Totally.

I hope your caffeine/sugar hangover isn't too bad :)

When I was in high-school, I needed to prepare for a test for which I was not remotely ready to take. It was a final (end of the year - don't know what they're called in your language/part of the world), and finals have a huge impact on the grade you'll get in the class. I hadn't even been attending, and, now that I think about it, I'm not sure that I knew what the subject was. To be ready, I figured I had to read a textbook. This was the night before.

Another friend was in the same predicament. We decided to buy a bunch of caffeine pills, espresso beans, coke (-a-cola), take it all, and study.

I had about twenty caffeine pills (roughly ten cups of strong coffee), a bunch of espresso beans, and a bunch of coke (-a-cola). Friend had the same.

We were so wired that studying was impossible. Our already daunting task was completely out of reach.

Still, we intended to study. To do that, we thought we should pick up our friend John. John, like us, was a terrible student and unprepared for the final. We could all help each other. And, after feeding John a bunch of caffeine in various forms, we decided to see if smoking peanut skins can actually get you high. We were *WAY* too uppity - a relaxing peanut skin buzz, we thought, might help.

I ran a BBS back in those days, and it was known, in part, for a large collection of text files. Before the web, getting your hands on information meant going to the library, a bookstore, or trusting someone who claimed to know what he was talking about. Through text files, I learned a lot about the world, some of which was true, some of which was totally bogus.

Among the bogus things, I now know, was that a race of reptoid aliens from Zeta Reticuli was heading to Earth on a giant asteroid spaceship. They intended to enslave us.

Another bogus thing, as I'm sure you can guess, was that smoking peanut skins gets you high.

I think we smoked ten or twenty thousand peanut skins before we gave up. I got a slight buzz from asphyxiation, but nothing else.

So, back to where we started, we were too wired to study, but still determined. The next attempt at calming down was, obviously, to scale the school itself. Nothing like a good workout to ease the tension.

We walked the mile to school. When we got there, we climbed the pool fence. From there, we worked out this really cool path up the wall that involved a drinking fountain, a floodlight, and a thick power cable. The whole way up, we encountered obstacles that required all sorts of ingenuity and stupidity to overcome.

But we made it. Once there, we were no less amped. Our plan failed.

We'd tried everything possible to study - caffeine pills, smoking peanut skins, climbing a four-story building... clearly, nothing was left.

Except that original determination to succeed.

We walked back home and stuffed our books into our bags just as the sun was coming up. Slung 'em over our shoulders, headed back out the door to return to school.

We arrived along with everyone else. Seemed like things were going to be fine. We felt the satisfaction of accomplishment, having climbed a building and proved the text file wrong, and we were still at the tail end of the caffeine high.

But, just as we entered the school, Ben and I - the ones who consumed most of the caffeine - collapsed. It's like someone threw a switch. We were on the floor, limp, and unable to move.

It took about an hour, but we managed finally to crawl, inch by inch, to the nurse's office. The office was only twenty feet or so from where we collapsed, so that ought to give you some perspective regarding our fatigue.

Made it there, passed out on cots after the nurse listened to our tale and told us we were stupid.

Slept right through the final.

Caffeine and sugar :)
August 5, 2008 2:49 PM
 

Lloyd said:

I was definately hyped on wonka bars. Rock climbing went swimmingly (hehe) and I didn't fall.. but my friend Deiniol did (rather large friend as it happens) and I was belaying for him (the whole thing that stops him falling - thats you) and since he's considerably larger than me, he came down and I went straight up :P He's also a little racist. Weirdly racist, like... "haha, look, a Jew" - racism isn't funny anyways, but that level of dumbness kills braincells :\

Still, t'was fun.

@Rory I'M (geddit?) totally going to pressure you harderer and totally write you back. Totally.

Our school nurse happens to be a receptionist also, and she's a bit of a cow. I have to argue with her every morning to get a key to open up backstage :P You sounded like a fun kid. Why the hell don't I have any friends that get high on caffeine? WHY am I not that friend? :P

I was completely wired last night. And now I'm procrastinating about going to sleep - an oxymoron of some sort, surely. I've gotta get up at 8am tomorrow (again. this is the worst week ever.) because some reporter from the north wales news is coming over to see me (cuz I won littlegurus competition :))... and I have to get my photograph taken. It being the holidays, personal hygeine has plummeted (no routine) and so.. spot haven.

Briiiiilliant.
August 5, 2008 5:49 PM
 

Andrew said:

Congrats, Lloyd. And as for the spots, well, it happens. No one would believe you were really a teen geek if you weren't a little spotty.
August 5, 2008 6:55 PM
 

Dick Carlson said:

Best post in a long time.  For god's sake don't go back into corporate.  I'm just now able to put several words together that actual mean something, and I've been out about 16 months.

I think I'll go and "re-brand" myself.
August 6, 2008 5:19 PM
 

Rory said:

Andrew -

"I'm very sorry your loved one is going through a difficult time, and I wish that person and you all the best in getting through it with a minimum of pain and expense."

Oddly, it's not really a *bad* thing. It's stressful as hell, and it's going to require some changes in life, but it gives me something to think about other than myself. Being an atheist has its disadvantages, at least for me, and one of them is that I've never felt motivated to do anything good to advance the cause of Rory. Any time I've done something biggish, it's been because I felt like I had a duty to someone else, or just wanted to provide something for someone. I've found zero happiness in ridiculously large paychecks. That said, I could do with a few right about now (or starting in January when things are expected to go wonky).

If I were religious, I could do things for my god/goddess/whatever. It probably sounds like I'm being facetious, but I'm not. I wish I could believe in something. I'd like it if life had a built-in meaning.

In the absence of such meaning, I'll accept motivation driven by my desire to help someone I care about.

I've been wanting something to kick me in the butt anyway. I've been wanting to go back to work, but merely wanting isn't enough. I also want an Aston-Martin, but I'm not willing to do what it takes to get one.

Love is weird. It makes Aston-Martins look unimpressive in the grand scheme of things. I have no idea how it does that.

Aston-Martins are very important.

"Please let us know if we can help."

Go make me a sandwich.

"Except Lloyd, here, who apparently is a bit hopped up on Wonka Bars. :-)"

I loved that line. I want to write "LOL" - I just can't. I wish there were an LOL that wasn't LOL. Like, L. From now on, a single "L" means "laughed" - as in: L.

L.

It doesn't look as enthusiastic as LOL, but, trust me, it is.

L. L. L.

Seriously. This comment is straying from what I originally intended, but I truly dug the Wonka bar thing :)

L.
August 6, 2008 6:43 PM
 

Rory said:

Punky -

"You will find your arch-nemesis 'utilize' listed under the section about 'pretentious diction'; words that 'are used to dress up a simple statement and give an aire of scientific impartiality to biased judgements'."

Osama! (I think "osama" is how a Japanese person would pronounce the word "awesome".)

"There's also a wonderfully ironic passage, proving that Orwell isn't without fault himself: 'the passive voice is wherever possible used in preference to the active'(!)"

Writing about language/grammar/etc. in a pedantic way is dangerous. Especially in English where it's so easy to make a mistake. When I read usage guides, I pay attention not only to the mistakes, but to the absurd lengths authors will sometimes go to avoid a construction that, although perfectly acceptable in most cases, violates some arcane rule. In the process, the writing gets so awkward that it would've been best to have broken the rule.

I have a couple books that deal exclusively with pronunciation, and they're both full of errors.

Language is hard because you can't be correct - you can only be right.
August 6, 2008 6:48 PM
 

Rory said:

Dave -

"Look, will you just write a book so I can press some money into the sweaty hands of a greedy proxy? If necessary, just bundle up all your existing essays and we'll buy those instead."

I've put together just such a book. I'd push forward with it, but, honestly, I'd feel guilty about selling people stuff they could get online for free. It wouldn't be *exactly* the same, as I've been editing it for content (removing most net references so they don't look like posts), style, grammar, and so on, but I still don't know if that's enough to justify charging for it.

Also, from what I've read about the publishing industry, I have a better chance of getting published if I begin with a nonfiction book. A book of Neopoleon posts wouldn't be nonfiction on account of the way I occasionally stretch the truth a little.

This week I came up with an idea that I think is pitch-worthy.

Now I have to figure out how to make a pitch...

"It worked for Joel. Twice!"

I know - it even worked when he published *other* people's articles (or comics, *cough* *cough*).
August 6, 2008 6:53 PM
 

Rory said:

LilBrownBear -

"At my current company, we use a lot of Chinglish...probably because it's essentially a Chinese-owned company.  Being a token gringo, I'm assaulted on a daily basis with farcical vocabulary.  E.g., 'You need to co-work together with Chow Ling.'"

Co-work together! Fantastic.

L.

"My favs are 'resource' (which I'm sure everyone hears misused WAY too much to describe us lumps of coal...er, people)"

Yeah. Don't get me started.

Boss: I'm going to allocate two resources to this project.

Other Boss: What kind of resources?

Rory: Are you talking about me? Who's the other resource?

Boss: Two of my employees. Rory will be one of them.

Other Boss: Ah. What if we need more resources?

Rory: I'm right here! Hello! You don't have to call me a resource! I'm a people!

Boss: Then we can get more resources. This is all I'm willing to give right now.

Other Boss: What if you need them back?

Rory: "Them"? Seriously - I'm in the room here with you guys. Are you even listening?

Boss: They've been branded with the mark of my herd. If you try to keep them, I'll find them.

Other Boss: Maybe we don't even want your crappy resources.

Rory: Stop calling me a resource! You guys stink! You suck! You stuck and you stink!

Boss: I don't blame you.

Rory: Oh, fuck off...

"I'm especially titillated when I hear them used together.  E.g., 'We must align our resources to ensure proper project visibility of our MBO.'"

When I first heard phrases like this, I actually thought They knew what They were talking about. I got lost quickly. A couple hours would pass, and I'd realize they were talking about lunch tomorrow.

It's so funny how "communication" is stressed - mentioned over and over and over in meetings, interviews, etc. - yet it's something businesspeople are apparently incapable of.

Your Chinese coworkers remind me of the two Chinese (Japanese?) guys in the movie Better off Dead who learned English by watching American sports television. Everything they said sounded like a play-by-play for [insert sport here]. It was brilliant.

It's also true to an extent. I've met people from all over the world who say they learned English by watching American movies/TV.

Kinda blows your mind and makes you wonder why the world isn't far crazier than it is.
August 6, 2008 7:03 PM
 

Rory said:

Dick -

"Best post in a long time."

*Only* post in a long time :)

But, thanks...

"For god's sake don't go back into corporate.  I'm just now able to put several words together that actual mean something, and I've been out about 16 months."

Work goes home with you in many ways. You don't realize it, though, 'cause it's obvious when it's a laptop, but not so much when it's a strange dialect where meaning is inversely proportional to the number of words used to say something.
August 6, 2008 7:06 PM
 

Dave said:

"...but I still don't know if that's enough to justify charging for it."

Are you crazy? Oh. Wait, that's been something of a theme. Let me rephrase: I think that any publisher worth his salt will leap on you with a toothy enthusiasm that will give Randall Munroe nightmares for *weeks* if you waft the scent of genuine Rory prose under their nose.

"Now I have to figure out how to make a pitch..."

Singing telegram is particularly recommended. Also I dropped a line to some people in the hope that they'll beat you up and steal the manuscript.
August 7, 2008 2:32 AM
 

Massif said:

The problem with the general level of verbosity, which surrounds the average Neopoleon reader like a cloud of pestulant education, is that the comments on this blog get long.

Seriously, the post is like 1 majillion words (less than a bajillion, more than a million, probably less than a billion too), and then the comments are another majillion words. I've got other things to do today people! Stop with all the talking so I can happily read through your silences, nod in agreement and be done with this all.

Anyway, my favourite part of corp-speak is that most people seem to have forgotten that it was invented specifically to transmit no information whatsoever. So people use it every day now, and whinge about everyone else lacking "communication skills" meanwhile their businesses slowly sink into the swamp of irony to which they have been relocated by divine intervention. I can't find the obituary of the self-accredited inventor of management speak, but he founded his communications based on the observation that the more information he conveyed the worse the share price did. So he invented a means of talking which conveyed no information whatsoever and still meant he could talk for days.

Anyway, ta ta, and if you want to earn big bucks, surely doing a bit of contracting over here in the UK would help, on account of your currency being ludicrous. In fact contracting in Europe would probably serve you better.
August 7, 2008 4:23 AM
 

Andrew said:

"At any rate, you should have never quit microsoft, because they accepted your work level with your problems. You'll never find a sweet job like that again. I think you should go beg for your job back to Sandquist."

That's a pretty dickish thing to say. It combines the worst features of "I told you so" and "You'll never be as good again as you used to be," without any sort of sympathy or constructive advice that might redeem it. Makes me wonder what your real goal is.
August 8, 2008 6:10 AM
 

Chris said:

"That's a pretty dickish thing to say"

You're right.

"Makes me wonder what your real goal is."

Hopefully he'll get his job and his benefits back???
August 8, 2008 7:27 AM
 

Betsy Aoki's WebLog said:

Sometimes blog posts from other people just combine in my head. I was reading Rory Blyth's Are You Passionate
August 8, 2008 10:22 PM
 

jeff said:

Remember, those ads are often written by the HR people who, strangely enough, don't always reflect the opinions of the people you'd be working with.
August 12, 2008 9:17 AM
 

Rory said:

Chris -

"Hopefully he'll get his job and his benefits back???"

I'm actually all right where the basic necessities are concerned. It's concern for next year and this looming familial deal on the horizon that has me looking again.

I still have health insurance - the best there is, pretty much. Can't complain about that.

I could have kept my position, pay, and benefits at Microsoft had I gone on full leave, but it's expected that, once leave is over, you'll come back. As I didn't see myself going back, I chose not to take advantage of that benefit. It's lame for Jeff (and the rest of JeffSand team) because, when an employee is on medical leave, you *can't* replace them - it doesn't free up head-count, so Jeff couldn't hire someone to replace me for the duration of my leave.

He, along with so many other people (Paul Murphy, Carl Franklin, etc.), did a lot for me and put up with a lot while doing it. Though I was a kick-ass worker for most of my time in tech, the last year was awful. If I were Jeff, I would've fired me - honestly. Why he didn't I have no idea. Maybe because he figured from my reputation/references/work that it was just a bad year brought on by my own stupidity combined with external forces beyond my control.

All that aside, I can't live in Seattle, Bellevue, or Redmond. I can't stand them. Horrible cities.

The next time I move, it's going to be someplace I want to be. Portland, San Francisco, and NYC are all places I like in the states. Outside the states, I'd love to go back to London, but it's *so* hard to get a job anywhere if you're an American.

Yep. I'm not sure there's sufficient compensation in the universe to compel me to move back to the Seattle area. It's claustrophobic, the traffic is absurdly bad, the people are cold, the weather sucks, they're all still hanging on to the glory of the grunge days, the restaurants are crap for a city of that size, and I don't even like the minor differences in foliage - their trees, compared to those in Portland, are anemic, sad little things.

Washington (state) also feels like it's ten (twenty (thirty?)) years behind in everything cultural (that's excluding the culture that's standing still such as the aforementioned grunge thing).

When I see a pickup in Portland that has one of those Calvin (of Calvin and Hobbes) stickers in the back window, depicting Calvin pissing on (take your pick) a Chevy symbol (if the truck is a Ford), a Ford symbol (if the truck is a Chevy), or whatever else, I know it's from Washington. Over and over, I've seen the sticker and then looked down to see the plate.

There are many other variations on that godawful Calvin theme. There are way too many moronic male hypermorons for me. The baseball caps on backward, the enormous shades with neon yellow borders, the lenses of which reflect a rainbow - it's the 80s, alive and well, celebrating WWF sensibilities in the form of weekly PPV UFC parties where thirty year-olds paw their tit-job girlfriends, chug cheap beer, chest-bump, and engage in pissing contests (figurative and literal).

I can hang out with those people, but not for more than a few minutes at a time. Unfortunately, they were my neighbors - many of the people I met.

Just can't do that. I need real, interesting people.

Anyway... ranting now.

Yeah. I'm aright for health insurance - my urgency is about the coming year. Giving myself six months to prep, I think I'll be OK.

We'll see...
August 15, 2008 1:22 PM
 

Rory said:

jeff -

"Remember, those ads are often written by the HR people who, strangely enough, don't always reflect the opinions of the people you'd be working with."

Yeah, but the HR people learn from everybody else (and vice-versa).

I found that language daily in emails, meetings, and any other time I had to talk to someone else about business. Water-cooler talk was fine, straying only occasionally in the direction of corp-speak silliness.

As for opinions... I actually share many more opinions with these people than you'd think - it's the way they're presented that drives me nuts.

The main reason I wanted to be a public speaker was that I was disgusted by the amount of jargon used, not to communicate more clearly (as jargon should), but to make the speaker look more intelligent, dressing up a simple matter so that it looks like you need a phd (or a HS diploma or whatever) to understand what's being said.

It's a pet-peeve, I guess. Enough so that I built part of my career around it :)
August 15, 2008 1:31 PM
 

Lloyd said:

London? You'd hate London now. Everythings all wrapped in bubblewrap because they're so afraid of terrorism. Technically, hasn't terror won? They're ... terrified, right?

Stay in America. Stay with your people! If you came to England they'd hate you, peraps, but around here the one American guy I know.. everybody loves him :)

But I wouldn't want you living round here. Not to offend, but if you did it would ruin the awesome feeling I have when I see your name in bold in my Outlook RSS feeds :) Still, if you did at least I'd have somebody to talk to about.. stuff. Like, nerdy stuff. Nobody here understands that :(

Stay where you're happy, man :)
*whisper* meeeeeeessssseeeeeennnnngggggeeeeeeerrrrrrrrr*/whisper*

Because even text emoticons need proper syntax. :)
August 15, 2008 2:40 PM
 

Chris said:

"it doesn't free up head-count, so Jeff couldn't hire someone to replace me for the duration of my leave. "

I always thought that he was high ranking enough to simply break whatever protocol there is.

Oh well. At any rate it doesn't sound like you would like LA very much.

I just think that you had a sweet once in a life time job because other software companies, and I've been at a few in LA now, are very demanding. They wouldn't let you do what you did at MS.
August 15, 2008 7:31 PM
 

punky said:

"it's *so* hard to get a job anywhere if you're an American"

Really? Why?
August 16, 2008 3:39 AM
 

peter said:

got to thinking just now decided to give this post a read as I tend to skim your long posts even though I really should give a dam about reading anything.. [from the brain the heart is kinda crap at emotions dam] and read lloyds comment which might have inspired me some..
..and read the bit about your friend and a financial equation..
which sounds that people are going to take some risks..
I've just got a lump settlement ..peanuts wont go into as it still hurts to think about
but I've had it up to my chinney chin chin so anything that you do sounds like the best thing in the world



August 17, 2008 8:44 AM
 

Chris said:

"it's *so* hard to get a job anywhere if you're an American"

Because they discriminate against people with a funny American accent?
August 20, 2008 3:28 PM
 

Chris said:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KgqtFXEtBD8

If you watch a little bit of the show Little Britain, it explains a lot. And yes, I've been to London and the UK. I didn't like it very much.
August 20, 2008 3:37 PM
 

lloyd said:

Hey Rory :)

Still no email! :( I'm in Cyprus right now, and after 3 days of no web I was looking forward to reading some Rory-stuffed-in-a-virtual-envelope :P

I'm just subtly reminding you :P

You were TOTALLY! gonna write me back :P laters :)
August 21, 2008 1:26 PM
 

Cliff said:

Rory,

What's this? A post every other month now? (I can't complain as I've taken yet another hiatus from my hardly-visited-site) And what's with all the drama? Are you completely out of your tech mind now and trying to live a non-geek life? I was all waiting for you to hit me up in the middle of the night over AIM/MSN/Whatever-IM like we'd planned but then something happened. A lot of something happened. I can't go into detail but suffice it to say that I'm pretty glad we never did that video-podcast thing because I hadn't been in my right (left, east, or west) mind. (It's all career related, nothing too heavy so it will probably go up on my site in another month or so.) I'd love to holla at you on the low but I see you're going through yet another stint of inactivity. In the interim I'll assent to your to utilizing the orthodox media to disentangle the ulterior memorandum underneath my oblique divulgence. (Just hit F12 on your mac and bring up the dictionary/thesaurus thingy.) You still my dawg, cuz. Hit me up whenever...

-Cliff
August 21, 2008 8:48 PM
 

Rory said:

Lloyd -

"London? You'd hate London now. Everythings all wrapped in bubblewrap because they're so afraid of terrorism. Technically, hasn't terror won? They're ... terrified, right?"

We're not exactly handling things with a lot of good old fashioned stoicism on this side of the ocean. Things are certainly better, of course, but still... weird.

Was in a cafe the other day with my lady friend, and a couple was sitting nearby. They were talking about travel, and one of them said, "No WAY would *I* travel on September 11th."

As my companion pointed out, September 11th is probably the *safest* day to travel since everybody's already extra vigilant.

Point being, our handling of the matter isn't very rational or intelligent. That's not to say everybody's like that, but many are.

'Course, you guys have other things to deal with. Your part of the world has always had the occasional bombing or other similar attack. We don't see that here for some reason.

Ultimately, though, it's not a reason I wouldn't move to London. We're paranoid; they're paranoid. That part's basically the same.

"Stay in America. Stay with your people! If you came to England they'd hate you, peraps, but around here the one American guy I know.. everybody loves him :)"

I actually had a wonderful time in London. I've spent a few months total over there, and always felt right at home. I just love it. It's my favorite city on the planet for its size and livability (that I've been to).

I miss it. A lot.

"But I wouldn't want you living round here. Not to offend, but if you did it would ruin the awesome feeling I have when I see your name in bold in my Outlook RSS feeds :) Still, if you did at least I'd have somebody to talk to about.. stuff. Like, nerdy stuff. Nobody here understands that :("

My name would probably go bold much more often because I'd have so much more to write about. Even the most mundane things were interesting to me in one way or another.

Last time I was there, for example, I almost got mugged in Holland Park. It was a really creepy kind of almost-mugging. I saw the guy from a distance (it was the middle of the night and I was alone on a path in the middle of nowhere). That alone would have been worth writing about, and i didn't even actually get mugged :)

"Stay where you're happy, man :)"

I was happy there. Very, very happy...
August 29, 2008 5:23 PM
 

Rory said:

punky -

"Really? Why?"

I don't know what the reasons are, but there are a bunch of legal bits in place that make it really tough.

It's like that all over. I get the feeling that it's because people think all 'Mericans are loaded and don't need jobs. That's obviously hyperbole, but I really have gotten that feeling.

Generally, 'Mericans are encouraged to get jobs cleaning up at pubs. If I could be happy doing that, I would, but I wouldn't, so I won't.

I was looking into getting a job with Microsoft in the UK, but even that's a pain. It's one of those prove-that-you're-bringing-a-skill-nobody-else-in-this-entire-country-and-its-associated-territories-has things.

Yep.
August 29, 2008 5:27 PM
 

Rory said:

Cliff -

"What's this? A post every other month now?"

I know... but, for once, it's been for good reasons rather than bad.

After all the crap of the past year (two? (three years?)), I decided to get my life back in shape whether I liked it or not.

Now, a month and a half later, I have a semi-normal life again. I'm dating a lovely woman, seriously looking for a job, and allowing myself to have a "real" summer - going out and doing things that are fun and feel good and are entertaining and don't involve drugs or whatever.

In that time, yeah, there's been huge drama, but I've been dealing with it as best I can, trying not to let it get to me. It seems to be working.

Essentially, I've been out living life, and doing so to the point that there hasn't been time for writing. I'm looking to change that - posted yesterday. When I go a long time without posting, I feel weird about starting again. Now that I have that awkward first one up, I think I can get back into it. I'm certainly not short of things to say - I've also been reading tons and it's been amazing.

So... stopped writing for once because things have been that good :)

"And what's with all the drama?"

When I left Portland in 2006, there were a *lot* of things I left undone. A lot of stuff I hadn't dealt with. And I mean a *lot* of stuff.

Not all those problems were waiting for me when I got back in October, but enough were to make moving back here not quite the calming, peaceful return I expected it to be.

Some new things popped up - things that were probably unavoidable - the big allergic reaction to my meds being the biggest. I was so out of commission from that that I couldn't have written had I wanted to (and I did want to).

Last week was packed solid with familial and friend drama. It feels like every second was dedicated to dealing with some situation or another. "Hellish" is a word I'd use to describe it. But the fact that I'm still here, that I just posted, and that I'm commenting is, I hope, evidence that I can go through crap and come out the other end all right. I was worried about how I'd be - every single blowup with my mom over the past year has been followed by at least a couple weeks of deep depression. I'm maintaining this time and I think I might get through without the usual episode.

That's awesome.

So that's the drama... yeah, there's been a lot of it.

"Are you completely out of your tech mind now and trying to live a non-geek life?"

Partly. I think I *had* to go that route. I didn't have any perspective anymore. Too many insane things have happened in my life where it intersects with tech. I needed to decompress and relearn how to relax and just have fun.

It's been good. Life didn't feel complete when I was dedicating nearly all my time to tech. Too many things were missing.

"I was all waiting for you to hit me up in the middle of the night over AIM/MSN/Whatever-IM like we'd planned but then something happened. A lot of something happened."

Yep. A *lot* of something.

I'd write about it, but I prefer not to think about it at all. I'm learning that there's only so much good that can come from introspection or talking about Stuff.

Hopefully there won't be much more something happening. It's prolly too much to ask given certain inescapable (for the most part) sources of potential drama in my life, but it's still what I'm aiming for...
August 29, 2008 5:41 PM
 

EricGu said:

Rory,

I think you just need to get over it, and face the truth.

You can write. Very well.  And, as "The Smartest Man In The World" (tm?), you shouldn't feel guilty about selling stuff that people could get for free.

I have a copy of "things my girlfriend and I have argued about". I have a copy of "mentally incontinent".  I will soon have a copy of waiterrant (or whatever it's called).  I buy them partly to have a collected set of works, and partly because I like to reward people who write stuff that I read. Plus, I can give the book to somebody who thinks like I do (ignoring, for the time being, that somewhat disturbing thought).

You won't make a ton of money, but you will make some.
September 6, 2008 12:58 PM
 

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December 16, 2008 5:02 AM
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