"Tractorman says: Winners don't do drugs."
"Why the fuck do mowers have drinks-holders anyway?"
"I've got the John-Deer logo on my cock as well." (No, I don't know why I said this, i think I have some sort of forum-based tourettes).
Finally:
"So, what you're saying is: mowing lawns is just another aspect of my personality in crisis? And that I'm somehow taking out my frustration on the grass when I should be reconciling the many factions of my personality? That somehow I'm projecting my gestalt agression onto this tractor?
Fuck that."
Jeeze, out of four possible captions I've inserted two gratuitous fucks and a cock. (Also, I just said that... which is really awful.) I think I should go and think about what I've done.
The one, the only, the undisputed king of the world.